God Paged Me, pt. 4

.."I cried out with no reply
And I can't feel You by my side
So I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here and I"m never alone

And though I cannot see You
And I can't explain why
Such a deep, deep reassurance
You've placed in my life

We cannot separate
'Cause You're part of me
And though You're invisible
I'll trust the unseen"- Barlow Girl 'Never Alone'

This has been a twisted road. I feel things compelling me to put comprimises on that which I tell myself I cannot. Things that are pulling my towards that which is not good. Correction: In THIS time, it is not. Later down the road yes. Not right now. I had a big rant last night about things, how unfair life was, why good people seem to suffer alot. I sat there in tears, and anger and sorrow and pain and brief moments of ending things to get away from pain for good flashed by. This morning, I awoke feeling like crap. I am hurting. It is hurt because of how i am different, and many don't seem to understand why. They are so set in their patterns that anything different is not good. I am so feeling like Job right now! He ahd a 20 odd chapter rant about how unfair things were, but in the end rememebred that all things come from God, and for a reason. Love DOES exisit. Jesus loved all he knew even those who were driving nails into his hands. "Father forgive them for they know not what they do" (Luke 23:34) I mean seriously? He prayed for those who were driving nine inch spikes into His arms, and felt nothing but love for them. I am so reminded by the song lyrics above about that. God is with me, even when no one else is.